12/19/06

Joint bank accounts

Bob closed our joint bank account one month after our separation. Since I depended on his income to pay the mortgage and most of my bills, this step felt threatening. It increased my anxiety about my financial future. His assurances that he would take care of me fell on deaf ears. Hadn't he promised lifelong fidelity and love? Wasn't he breaking those promises?

I was also unaware that one spouse could close a joint account without the other spouse's knowledge or signature. Second, I had very little independent income at my disposal - less than $2,000 plus the tiny salary I earned from my three part time positions.

My advice to anyone whose spouse has left them is to make sure that you open a new bank account with as much money as you can free up. My dependence on Bob during this delicate time placed me in a powerless position, and my feeling of helplessness and dependency affected our counseling sessions. I never quite felt like his equal during those times.

1 comment:

*M*E* said...

My husband drained ours 8 months bf he told me he wanted a divorce. Of course it was our US joint bank acct. We were living in the UK so I never checked the one that had most of our money.
Now, I'm back in the US living at my parents with my six yr. old daughter. He was brutal, violent, mentally abusive, and a Harvard JD. He had planned everything out at least a year in advance and had a mistress at that time as well. We went on four major family vacations to Brussels, Amsterdam, Morrocco, a Mediterranean cruise, then bam a month later he tells me he wants a divorce, "things aren't working out." Then, the craziness begins. He wants a UK collaborative divorce: his demands, no child support, no spousal maintenance (support), no claims on future earnings since he was quitting the law practice to go back for his MBA, perfect timing he told me, he only has student financial obligations and cannot pay our daughter or I a pence so to speak.